


To See You Smile, Would Mean the World

by Kawaiicoyote



Series: It's Better This Way [1]
Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Background Relationships, Derek Has Feelings, Derek Smiles, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Feelings, Implied Character Death, Implied Relationships, Jealousy, Lydia Martin & Stiles Stilinski Friendship, Lydia and Stiles are bros, Pack Bonding, Pining, Slight Panic Attack, angst that turns to fluff, hair petting
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-06-23
Updated: 2013-06-23
Packaged: 2017-12-15 20:43:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,703
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/853854
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kawaiicoyote/pseuds/Kawaiicoyote
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“As I was saying before I was rudely interrupted,” she huffs and then looks at him with what can only be concern. “We find someone, we fall in love, and it’s just that easy really. But sometimes we don’t end up with that person we love. Or we don’t get to stay with them. And even though we do or don’t stop loving them, the most important thing is that all we want is for them to be happy.”</p><p>or</p><p>The one where Stiles is jealous and Lydia gives him a heart to heart talk.</p>
            </blockquote>





	To See You Smile, Would Mean the World

**Author's Note:**

> Edit: This fic now no longer contains "Denise" but is rightfully replaced with canon Jennifer, sorry about that lovelies!
> 
> This fic kind of snowballed out of control. Not very long but I had to finish it once the idea implanted in my head.  
> Roughly proofread again, oops.  
> Wanted to at least put in that while there isn't too much of Stiles/Derek happening there's a little of it going on and of course there's Stiles feelings.  
> Sorry for those of you who wanted outright Sterek. That won't happen for a little while.

He reclines back against the picnic table with his long limbs sprawled out in front of him. With his sunglasses on he feels like he’s invisible, like nothing can touch him. Like nothing can hurt him.

But as he watches across the park, the white hot poker of jealousy and hurt seizes his chest and threatens to suffocate him completely.

It’s a total creeper move of him to sit away from everyone the way he is, but he can’t really be bothered by it. If anyone asks, he’s fully prepared to tell them that he’s seeking refuge from the sun’s rays. Which isn’t too far from the truth anyway. What can he say, he’s got delicate skin and burns easily and the shade feels good.

Aside from them, the park is vacant and for once Stiles wishes there were other people that aren’t pack to interact with. It’s like everyone has paired off to join the Arch and another surge of hurt spikes through him.

On a blanket out in the middle of the park and lounging out in the sun Scott lays with this head in Allison’s lap. She’s smiling her big dimpled smile at something Scott’s saying with hand gestures and goofy faces that only make Allison laugh and shake her head. 

Not too far away from them Isaac occupies another blanket with Cora and Boyd. Cora sits across from Isaac, her long dark hair piled messily on top of her head, on the side of the blanket that’s settled half in the shade. The three of them have a deck of cards and are playing some kind of game. Boyd looks lost in thought like he’s remembering something painful if by the way his hands clutch the cards is any indication. Isaac seems oblivious to him or is choosing to ignore it, maybe like he’s trying to be as normal as possible. Stiles can’t really tell. But what he can tell is the way Isaac stares at Cora a little too long or laughs a little too loud at whatever she says. Stiles rolls his eyes at the beta’s crush and shoves his sunglasses up his nose with a huff.

A water bottle suddenly appears in front of his face and he startles a bit but takes it when a quick glance shows Lydia perched on top of the picnic table, dressed immaculately in a white cotton dress that makes her look like a summer’s dream.

“Not feeling very social today?” Lydia inquires as Stiles takes a long gulp from the water bottle. Stiles shrugs and puts the cap back on, then starts to pick at the label just to give his hands something to do, to give his mind something to focus on other than the pack or Lydia or…. His thoughts trail off when a light high laugh reaches his ears.

Lydia sighs and without looking he can just tell she’s shaking her head at him.

“Let him be happy, Stiles.”

He bites down hard on the inside of his cheek, hard enough to taste copper.  Inside in his head he feels like screaming, like crying, like throwing the biggest bitch fit and demanding why _he_ can’t be the one to make him happy.

In retrospect it makes sense, he supposes. Ms. Blake makes sense for Derek. She’s closer to his age. She’s all soft curves and sweet smiles and kindly spoken words and sharp intelligence. Stiles stomach feels sour when the thought hits him that Ms. Blake, or Jennifer as she insisted they call her outside of school, looks like a Hale. With her long lithe frame and dark hair she looks even more the part. It makes Stiles feel even worse. Makes him wish he’d never thought it in the first place. Because if _he’s_ thought it then he’s surely not the only one.

The panic that surges through him is so sudden that he doesn’t know what to do. He feels paralyzed completely and his chest feels tights. He realizes belatedly that he hasn’t been breathing and can’t exactly remember how to.

Stiles is vaguely aware of the pack stilling around him. They’re stopping what they’re doing to look at him and around him. Trying to figure out where the danger is lurking. Soft growls are reaching his ears but he can’t snap himself out of his panic to let them know nothing is wrong. They’re still safe.

A soft warm hand at the back of his neck startles him enough to allow him to draw a shaky breath. It gives him something to focus on, something good. Slowly but surely this heart slows to a rate that’s acceptable for the pack to not be as concerned and they go back to whatever it was they were doing before.

“It’s okay,” Lydia says quietly as she starts to card her fingers through his hair.

Stiles shakes his head, throat still feeling tight.

“It’s not though,” he settles on saying because for once he’s lost for words.

Automatically his eyes drift to across the park, to where Derek sits atop another picnic table with Jennifer sitting between his feet. She’s dressed similarly to Lydia, but her dress is a soft yellow. Her hair hangs down in soft curls over her shoulders and Stiles just can’t tamp down the beast of green envy within himself.

He hates the way she smiles up at Derek. The way it looks so easy. How Derek’s shoulders aren’t tense and how he doesn’t look as tired as he used to. He hates how Derek even smiles back at her. Not the fake smile he uses on everyone else, but a genuine one that crinkles his eyes at the corners.

But what Stiles hates the most is that he’s not the one putting it on his face.

“Do you really wish he were still miserable?”

Stiles doesn’t hesitate to shake his head.

“Do you wish that he still didn’t trust people?”

“No.”

“Do you really wish that he still didn’t smile?”

Stiles sighs and closes his eyes.

“You know that I don’t,” he bites out like it physically pains him to talk.

Lydia’s hand stills against the nape of his neck for a moment, a warm comforting weight before it moves away completely and she slides down to sit next to him on the bench, their sides pressed together in a companionable way.

She takes his hand and pats it and gives him a smile that looks strained. He never really pegged Lydia for a nurturing kind of person, but it really is becoming of her.

“Look,” she says looking cross for a moment before she schools her features. “For the most of us, we find someone and we fall in love.”

“Look, Lydia, I appreciate this but_”

She cuts him off with a sharp look that instantly has his jaw snapping shut. That look alone threatens imminent pain and doom and he’d just rather not have that inflicted upon himself.

“As I was saying before I was _rudely_ interrupted,” she huffs and then looks at him with what can only be concern. “We find someone, we fall in love, and it’s just that easy really. But sometimes we don’t end up with that person we love. Or we don’t get to stay with them. And even though we do or don’t stop loving them, the most important thing is that all we want is for them to be happy.”

Stiles really doesn’t want to agree with her logic. Like, he really doesn’t, in the slightest. But, he does. He truly does. Because he can’t stand it if Derek went back to being that unhappy, depressed, scared, shell of a man.

All he does want is for Derek to be happy, able to trust again. To be able to love life again.

And even if he’s not the one solely making Derek happy, he knows that he’s still able to help just the slightest.

“It still sucks,” Stiles mutters and leans against Lydia’s side. She puts her arm around his shoulders and even though it probably looks a little off, neither of them cares.

Lydia nods and gives a short laugh, pulling out her cell phone from a pocket her dress has, and opens up her facebook app. Stiles isn’t sure what he’s supposed to be looking at, or if he’s supposed to be looking at all, when Lydia turns the screen towards Stiles.

It’s Jackson’s profile.

His brows bunch in confusion, not exactly sure what he’s supposed to see from all this, when he takes notice of Jackson’s profile picture in the top left corner. His hair is jet black now, it’s weird or at least it is to Stiles. But there’s also a huge smile on his face, and he looks so carefree and happy that it looks like a complete stranger is smiling back at the camera.

Then Stiles takes notice of the girl in the picture. She’s blonde and has a rounder face from what he can make of her profile; it’s all he can see since the girl in the picture is pressing her puckered lips to Jackson’s cheek. She is not Lydia, at all. It sends Stiles mind reeling.

He turns his attention away from the screen to see Lydia smiling sadly at her phone, at Jackson’s picture.

“Her name is Giselle and goes to the same school as Jackson. Apparently she’s a human born to wolf parents and their pack is super small. Even smaller than our pack. He’s welcome there and is flourishing and is happy.”

There are tears on Lydia’s lashes but she refuses to let them fall. She looks up from her phone and smiles at Stiles. It’s still pained but completely genuine.

“He’s alive and happy. That’s really all I could ever want. He may not be with me, but that isn’t the most important thing, not really.”

Stiles nods and slides his hand into Lydia’s and holds on as tightly to hers as she is to his.

“Just be there for him, Stiles. Be his friend. Be that idiot goofball you’ve always been around him.” Stiles glares at her and she just rolls her eyes at him. “But don’t be this jealous little bitch that pulls away from the pack. Because that’s only going to make him feel guilty and hurt him and that’s something I know you don’t want.”

And that’s something he has to agree with. His shoulders slump but he doesn’t really feel that bad anymore. There’s still a hollow ache at the center of his chest, but it doesn’t feel like it’s on the verge of collapsing in on itself.

“You have to realize, she’s the first relationship he’s had since the wicket bitch of the west.” Stiles snorts and the corner of his mouth quirks. Lydia squeezes his hand. “He’s learning what it’s like to be with someone, learning to trust someone. It’s really not even about them being together. It’s about Derek learning how to live again, how to be better. And he’s finding that help through Jennifer. Don’t take that away from him because you’re not what he needs right now.”

“I really hate it when you make sense.”

Lydia laughs and pats his cheek with her free hand before sneakily snatching his sunglasses off of his face. He makes a scandalized noise to which she ignores, putting them on herself and Stiles doesn’t have the heart to take them back when they look so much better on her, the little harpy.

She stands and brushes her hands over her dress, smoothing away imaginary wrinkles in the fabric then looks at him over her shoulder. “Besides, maybe he doesn’t know how to be what you need right now, Stiles.”

He looks at her, dumbfounded. That thought had never crossed his mind before.  She leaves him then and wonders over and plops down next to Boyd who goes rigid next to her. He frowns a bit at how even months later Boyd is still having a tough time coping, especially in Erica’s absence. Lydia though, pays no mind and hooks her chin over his shoulder and points to the cards in his hand.

Stiles lets out a long breath and scrubs his hands through his hair. He feels better now that Lydia’s talked to him. Not as angry or jealous.

His eyes wonder of their own violation and that bitter churn of jealousy that he can’t help lances through him when he sees Derek press a kiss to Jennifer’s forehead. It’s such a shy and sweet gesture that Stiles feels ashamed, like he’s intruding on their moment, even from across the park.

Jennifer stands from the bench, her hand cupping Derek’s cheek for a moment before she walks away. Or rather starts walking towards Stiles. He panics for a moment, wondering what he should do, if she’s going to try and talk to him or chew him out for making eyes at her man.

But all she does is smile at him and continue walking. He feels like an idiot and slumps down on the bench when he remembers the parking lot is behind him.

When he raises his eyes he sees that Derek is looking at him. Not behind him where Jennifer is surely getting into her car, but at him. It makes his heart stutter in his chest, and stomach swoop.

And then Derek smiles at him. A genuine, eye crinkling smile that lights up his face. It makes Stiles feel warm all over.

He smiles back and gives him a wave. If anything that makes Derek smile more, amusement clear on his face despite the distance between them.

It makes Stiles feel better. Because even though he’s not with Derek, might not ever be with him, he can still put that smile on his face and help him be happy. He can help him by just being there for him, like Lydia said.

When they break eye contact his gaze flickers to Lydia who is watching him, a grin on her face. He scoffs and pushes up from the bench and makes his way over, plopping himself down right next to Isaac who hasn’t even noticed how badly he’s losing to Boyd.

“Isaac my man, stop making moon eyes for a second, Lydia is helping Boyd own your ass,” he says slapping a hand to the center of Isaac’s back. It startles him and he looks at Stiles like he hadn’t heard him come over at all let alone sit next to him.

Cora tries and fails to hide her laugh behind her cards.

Derek’s booming laugh catches them all off guard.

A moment later Derek is settling himself down on the blanket and grinning at them.

“How about we start a new game and I’ll show you how the game is played.” Derek says cockily and it’s just so different to see him acting so carefree and confident.

Stiles snorts and cracks his fingers, “Don’t get mad when I beat your almighty alpha ass.”

“Challenge accepted.”

They stare at each other for a moment, both grinning and it’s perfect. There’s no relationships, no girlfriends, no pack, no nothing. It’s just the two of them. And it makes him feel better.

Next to them, Lydia breaks the moment by tossing her hair over her shoulder, taking the deck into her hands as she shuffles and levels a mischievous look at all of them. “We all know that I’ll be the one to win this, don’t even pretend to be superior than me.”

“We should have brought popcorn for this,” Scott says a few feet away where he and Allison watch.

“Twenty bucks says Derek cleans the floor with them,” Allison comments, watching as Lydia doles out the cards.

Three rounds in Isaac is pouting, Scott is doubled over Allison from laughing so hard, Lydia is seething with rage, and Derek looks like a smug asshole as he lays down the winning hand once again.

“Go again?” He asks too innocently.

Stiles takes it all in as Lydia shuffles the deck violently and thinks that yeah, he can do this. Everyone is safe and happy and that’s all he needs right now.

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> *twiddles thumbs* so, kudos or comments?


End file.
